Sunday, July 24, 2016

Watch her like a hawk!

"My sympathies are all with you," Miss Dolby continued, softening. I wish you life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness, and I shall give three hearty cheers if you come through, but I'm like the referee in a football game. He can't take sides. He may want the boys in the pink shirts to clobber the lads in the green with purple stripes, but he doesn't allow that to affect his decisions. Let the pinkos step for an instant from the strait and narrow path and, much as he loves them, up goes his whistle and starts tootling."

(from Bachelors Anonymous, by Sir Pelham Wodehouse)

Saturday, July 23, 2016

Stiff upper lip

          "Take the boy who stood on the burning deck whence all but he had fled. Can't have been very pleasant for him."
          "Not very."
          "But I've never heard that he grumbled. And Napoleon. He suffered from chronic dyspepsia. Couldn't digest a thing. Every time he got up from dinner he felt as if a couple of wildcats were fighting for the wildcat welterweight championship inside him. And Waterloo on top of that."
          "And probably all he said was Oo la la."
          "I shouldn't wonder."
          "Or Zut."
          "Yes, possibly Zut."

(from Bachelors Anonymous, by Sir Pelham Wodehouse)

Friday, July 22, 2016

On the plump side?

          The young man said, "Mr. Pickering here tonight, Mac?"
          To which Mac replied, "He's round in  front," which would not have been a bad description of the visitor propped against the wall, who was noticeably stout. Julius Caesar would have liked him.

(from Bachelors Anonymous, by Sir Pelham Wodehouse)

Power corrupts

"Many a small man is considered good while he remains small, but let power come to him, and he becomes a raging fury."

(from The Walking Drum, by Louis L'Amour)

Thursday, July 21, 2016

Positively looking forward

"Only the weak blame parents their race, their times, lack of good fortune, or the quirks of fate. Everyone has it within his power to say, This I am today, that I shall be tomorrow. The wish, however, must be implemented by deeds."

(from The Walking Drum, by Louis L'Amour)

The Conning Tower

At one time in my parents' lives, "The Conning Tower" was a well-known newspaper column written by Franklin P. Adams. Unfortunately, to today's populace he is largely unknown; but his wide range of knowledge made him a formidable panelist on the Information Please radio program.



Wednesday, July 20, 2016

White sheep of the family

Caesar Romero: "How come you never mentioned this uncle of yours?"

Milton Berle: "The family never mentioned him. He was the one that was honest and legitimate."

(from the movie A Gentleman at Heart)

Seeing the future

          "Can you see the future, Kerbouchard?"
          "Who would wish to? Our lives hold a veil between anticipation and horror. anticipation is the carrot suspended before the jackass to keep him moving forward. Horror is what he would see if he took his eyes off the carrot."

(from The Walking Drum, by Louis L'Amour)

Tuesday, July 19, 2016

Gut Bucket Blues

In his novel Spade and Archer, author Joe Gores has Sam Spade whistling a tasty little number called "Gut Bucket Blues." And, yes, there is such a piece of music.


Just do this

Life is a continual learning process, and if a man lives to be as old as Methuselah there will still be issues in which he makes mistakes. However, if a man could just resolve to learn from his mistakes and contrive somehow not to repeat the same mistakes, he would take a giant step toward a prosperous and happy life. The problem with most of us is that we are very reluctant learners.

Sometimes Louis L'Amour came up with some good thoughts

"The woman who wishes to be the equal of a man usually turns out to be less than a man and less than a woman. A woman is herself, which is something altogether different than a man."

(from The Walking Drum)

Monday, July 18, 2016

Why books?

"Reading without thinking is as nothing, for a book  is less important for what it says than for what it makes you think."

(from The Walking Drum, by Louis L'Amour)