"Mother still insists that you had known her before and that the story she told was true and that she only took the necklace as an afterthought. Isn't she funny!"
"Funny," said George heavily, "is not the word. She is one long scream from the rise of the curtain, and ought to be beaten over the head with a blackjack. If you want my candid and considered opinion of that zymotic scourge who has contrived to hook herself on to your family in the capacity of step-mother to you and general mischief-maker to the rest of the world, let me begin by saying . . . However, there is no time to go into that now."
(from The Small Bachelor, by Sir Pelham Wodehouse)
[I like that term "zymotic scourge." That describes a lot of females I know.]
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